New CRD Keliher at Fast Horse world headquarters in Minneapolis

I recently sat down with Mike Keliher for an interview about his promotion to Client Relationship Director.  Keliher was promoted on August 1st for pretty much kicking ass on a bunch of stuff since he joined us early last year.  Keliher came to Fast Horse after a long incarceration, followed by a brief rehabilitation period.  He calls those his lost years, and claims he’d be “a VP somewhere right now” had he not fallen in with a shadowy group of “APR accredited types.”  That dark chapter was the only off-limits topic during our wide-ranging and often emotional discussion. Here are some highlights: 

Q: You’ve been promoted from Client Relationship Manager to Client Relationship Director.  People want to know:  What’s the damn difference?

 A: The third word. And it’s nice to know (believe, at least) my colleagues and clients appreciate the contributions I’ve made. Along with the step up in responsibility and respect, the embroidered smoking jacket is a nice touch. Looks great in our shag-carpeted lounge.

 Q: Please share the ways in which you have thrown your impressive new title around in social settings. 

 A: Actually, I don’t throw it around much. That’d be crass. I just make sure to bring my colleague  Cydney with me, and she reminds everyone about “our newest director!”

 Q: Your promotion left you with a lot of out-of-date business cards.  Have you been stuffing deli counter fishbowls in hopes of winning  free meal drawings, or did you find another creative way to get rid of them?

 A: You know the saying “Don’t forget the little people”? My way of remembering the little people is to give them my old “Client Relationship Manager” business cards. That title still impresses enough folks. And it works well in the Chipotle fishbowl.

 Q:  Did you ever dare to dream as a young boy that one day you’d be a Client Relationship Director at Fast Horse?

 A: I did, but I was often quickly distracted by my prayers for Douggie Baseball – Doug Mientkiewicz – to return to the Twins. (By the way, I spelled that accurately without looking it up. Superfan.)

 Q:  Who was more proud when you breathlessly delivered the news of your promotion:  your lovely wife Ania?  Your spunky mom?  Or the cashier at the gas station in Woodbury where you get your morning coffee?

A: See above about Cydney. But Ania was pretty jazzed, too. So much so she violated your initial “keep it under your hat until we make an announcement” mandate. That’s a big step for her; she felt bad for disobeying.

And let’s set something straight: Stops in Woodbury only happen when absolutely necessary. Going to Woodbury for coffee is like going to a giant home center when you need half a dozen drywall anchors: It’s going to take 45 minutes longer than it should and you’re probably going get lost trying to get out. When I stop for coffee on the way in to the office, my shop of choice is the North Loop’s own Corner Coffee . But that’s just because St. Paul’s Kopplin’s Coffee  is just a bit too far out of the way.